Boobies

That got your attention, didn't it? Thought so.

But this post is only about 40% about boobies. The other 60% is about some booby-related shit that troubled me greatly. Let me explain.

First off, the product is called Easy Curves. It's this little stick thing that costs $9.99 and looks like a racing baton, with two pistons (one on each side). What females do is they hold the pistons and squeeze them into the baton and then pull them out again, and then repeat. What THAT does is, on average, increase bust size from 36.4 inches to 37.2 inches in 30 days.

Now I'm sure many of you are reading this and thinking something along the lines of "why does a machine that only costs $9.99 (plus shipping and handling) and increases the size of the b00bz bother you so, Fred the Observer?"

And to be honest, I don't really know how to answer the question. Besides the fact that boobies are awesome pretty much 100% of the time and all these shenanigans with shaping and shit are (in my opinion) pretty unnecessary, I dunno.

I think, actually, that the motion is what bothers me the most. That, coupled with the expression on the demonstration chick's face on the home page of the website (linked above). She looks like . . . I dunno. Like she's fixin' to bust a nut or something. Whatever the "official" description of her expression is, it's DEFINITELY not the expression that one would expect one to have when using such a machine.

Be happy with your boobies ladies!

Shit, I am.

Hehe.

Stay classy