The MOST AWKWARD EXPERIENCE EVER

Readership, I was waiting for class to start this fine afternoon at around 12, when I suddenly felt the need to drop a deuce - y'know, take a pooper.

So I went into the bathroom. And into the handicapped stall (because I never know when the urge to dance might strike, so I need the space). And then I proceeded to deuce.

Seconds later, someone else entered the bathroom, walked deliberately and purposefully towards the other, non-handicapped stall, and entered. Then shit got weird.

Instead of just unzippin' and taking a leak (as, believe it or not, a LOT of guys do, even with free urinals available), he started taking shit out of his pockets - metallic-sounding shit. And a lot of it.

So there I was, on the bowl, pants around muh damn ankles, and there was this guy in the stall next to me changing out of his street clothes into his fuckin' hitman uniform, checking his guns and shit. I would've shit myself but A) I had already finished shitting and B) I was trying not to have this crazy dude know that there was someone in the next stall watching him prepare and whatnot.

Then it got weirder. Because in the span of like a second and a half, he dropped his pants, whirled around 180 degrees, sat down on the bowl AND RECTALLY EXPLODED.

So then I was trying not to laugh cuz he was still firin' off small arms (as opposed to bombs), and I was able to make myself presentable again, I washed my hands and got the fuck up outta there.

Probably the single funniest/most awkward moment of my life.

Stay classy