Michael, Farah, Ed . . . and now Billy

At about noon today, I heard that Billy Mays, of "OxiClean" and "Mighty Putty" fame, died.

I'm not gonna lie, Billy Mays annoyed the everloving shit out of me. He was always screaming about OxiClean, his mustache-beard combination pissed me off for some reason, and he was generally a loudmouthed obnoxious dude.

But in being that loudmouthed obnoxious dude with the strange mustache-beard combo, he accomplished exactly what he set out to - brand recognition. You wouldnt' even have to hear the words "OxiClean" or "Mighty Putty" - but as soon as you heard "HI! BILLY MAYS HERE!" you knew he was going to do his damnedest to sell you some crazy shit that ranged from highly asanine to slightly useful. You knew that Billy Mays was first and foremost a salesman, and he must've been effective because he kept getting on these commercials.

This is not a good week to be a 50-year-old celebrity.




RIP Billy Mays
July 20, 1958 - June 28, 2009
May you whiten angel wings to a more brilliant white with your OxiClean, and may we have the strength of Mighty-Putty to continue on without you.

And as for you, readership?

Stay classy